A week ago, on our way to a dental appointment, my husband and I stopped at a nearby masjid to pray maghrib.
I hadn't set foot in that masjid for eleven years and two days—the day I got married. And as I stepped inside amid the hustle and bustle of that day's errands, time seemed to slow down.
My eyes searched everything, measuring it against my memory. The entrance was different; it seemed to have been expanded. The stairwell leading up to the women's section, though, was exactly the same. I ran my hands over the banister where I'd rested the papers so I could sign my name. My uncle had brought the marriage contract to me, and my sister had rushed to follow me and snap a picture from above.
I climbed the steps slowly. I noticed the carpet was a deep red; I couldn't remember what colour it was before. I plodded slowly through the women's prayer area and up a few steps to where it extended around the corner. I looked at the spot where I'd sat on a plastic chair while little girls in white dresses—my cousins—had surrounded me and smiled into the camera. My eyes followed the long railing where I'd stood watching the proceedings below. It was closed now, a wall of frosted windows.
The ladies waiting for the adhan looked my way—with raised eyebrows, I imagined. They couldn't know the importance of the place to me, didn't know why I stood at the window looking out as the call to prayer reverberated through the building.
I stood in the middle of the prayer area under a slowly rotating fan. When the iqama was called, the ladies assembled beside me in a row.
A beautiful voice filled the place with words that seemed meant for me:
It is Allah who created the heavens and the earth, and sent down rain from the sky, and produced thereby fruits as provision for you.
And He subjected for you the ships to sail through the sea by His command, and He subjected for you the rivers.
And He subjected for you the sun and the moon, continuous [in orbit], and He subjected for you the night and the day.
And He gave you from all you asked of Him.
And if you were to count the favours of Allah, you could not enumerate them. Indeed, mankind is most unjust and ungrateful.
(August 2018)
I hadn't set foot in that masjid for eleven years and two days—the day I got married. And as I stepped inside amid the hustle and bustle of that day's errands, time seemed to slow down.
My eyes searched everything, measuring it against my memory. The entrance was different; it seemed to have been expanded. The stairwell leading up to the women's section, though, was exactly the same. I ran my hands over the banister where I'd rested the papers so I could sign my name. My uncle had brought the marriage contract to me, and my sister had rushed to follow me and snap a picture from above.
I climbed the steps slowly. I noticed the carpet was a deep red; I couldn't remember what colour it was before. I plodded slowly through the women's prayer area and up a few steps to where it extended around the corner. I looked at the spot where I'd sat on a plastic chair while little girls in white dresses—my cousins—had surrounded me and smiled into the camera. My eyes followed the long railing where I'd stood watching the proceedings below. It was closed now, a wall of frosted windows.
The ladies waiting for the adhan looked my way—with raised eyebrows, I imagined. They couldn't know the importance of the place to me, didn't know why I stood at the window looking out as the call to prayer reverberated through the building.
I stood in the middle of the prayer area under a slowly rotating fan. When the iqama was called, the ladies assembled beside me in a row.
A beautiful voice filled the place with words that seemed meant for me:
It is Allah who created the heavens and the earth, and sent down rain from the sky, and produced thereby fruits as provision for you.
And He subjected for you the ships to sail through the sea by His command, and He subjected for you the rivers.
And He subjected for you the sun and the moon, continuous [in orbit], and He subjected for you the night and the day.
And He gave you from all you asked of Him.
And if you were to count the favours of Allah, you could not enumerate them. Indeed, mankind is most unjust and ungrateful.
(August 2018)
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